October 22, 2022 Issue, Page 6 of 22

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6 - The Elk City News October 22, 2022 Activities Family Friend Develops A Sense Qwne-s—-Believe It or Not! Of Entitlement ly feasible. I don't want to risk However, my mother holds on Dear Abby my sons’ friendship, but I feel to unhealthy behaviors. She the situation has gotten out of can be quite mean to family, DEAR ABBY: I have two hand. - NOT AN ATM IN THE and it makes me not want to sons, 18 and 20. Since they SOUTH be around her. My kids aren’t were young, whenever we in- close to her because 1 limit vited one of their friends to DEAR NOT AN ATM: You their exposure to her. join us for an activity, dinner, mentioned this young man’s Td love to have a healthy ete., [have treated that friend. parents stopped reimbursing relationship with my mother, Over the past few years, we you for their son’s expenses but I know it isn’t possible un- N Fesruary (5, (921, have included one friend in when he turned 18. What oth- til she gets some help. Is there Dr. EVAN O'NEILL KANE PERFORMED AN APPENDECTOMY more activities as well as on er things do they expect him to ON HIMGELF TO DEMONSTRATE THE BENEFITS OF LOCAL away to tell her I think she'd be numerous family vacations. start shouldering responsibil- ANESTHETIC! ‘The problem is, the more we ity for? You have been more happier and healthier and we'd have treated this friend, the than generous by continuing have a better relationship if she CASTARIO more he has expected. For ex- to subsidize him. went to therapy? Or must Ijust ample, during our last week- Because you are uncomfort- accept that this is my mother onan long vacation, he expected us able with the situation, a con- and leave it be? -- HELPED IN to pay not only for every meal, versation is overdue about how MASSACHUSETTS BRAING HAVE DORRIT ON but also every little incidental. these things should be handled When he was once asked for in the future. Be sure to let him DEAR HELPED: Tell your IS ANOTHER $10 by a vendor, he immedi- know that he is always wel- mother you would like to have ately complained. (It was for a come, but now he is an adult a closer relationship with her, WORD FOR J short safety class so he could and some ground rules need but something is holding you GOOSE BUAPS. G iet ski as our guest.) to be set. And since your son's back. Rather than say SHE Before he was 18, his par- friend seems not to have mas- could benefit from therapy, ents sent money to help cover tered the words “thank you,” it suggest that if the two of you expenses, but now I cover it would be a kindness to remind could get some family therapy all. This would be a lot easier him how important they are. together, it might be help- to accept if he even once said “thank you” or seemed appre- DEAR ABBY: Is there a sen- ful. Explain that talking with clative. Aside from this, he’s a sitive and appropriate way to someone was enormously pleasant, respectful 19-year- suggest to my mother that she helpful for you and your fam- ald who has been my sons’ would benefit from therapy? ily. If you approach the subject friend for almost 10 years. Our family has suffered from obliquely rather than head-on, Should I say something to generational abuse. After years she might be willing — IF she’s him? Should I ask if he enjoys of therapy, I've been able to interested in a closer relation- our trips and activities and if stop that cycle, and my chil- ship with you. If she’s unwill- bi f hii dren hi in a lov- ing or defensive, you will have cxpenses? 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